Oh I'm in baby.
Oracle is a complete piece of shit! I ended up using SQL Query analyzer via a linked server to run queries against the Oracle database. That SQL+ (I call it SQL-) tool is completely worthless. If I ever have to develop another app for Oracle I will start looking for another job.
It also has to be the worst documented product EVER. As an experienced SQL developer / DBA, it still took me DAYS to figure out how to create an Oracle stored procedure that could return a recordset to my .NET app. WTF!