I just found out a prankster friend of mine was hired by my company, and will be working relatively near to where I presently sit. The cubicle where he will be is unoccupied. They have been doing a lot of moving in the office, and there are hundreds of bags of styrofoam peanuts all over the place.

I think I should fill up the new cubicle with peanuts, and hermetically seal it with clear plastic packing tape. My friends' new boss agrees, but isn't sure if it's a good idea.

I say policy-be-damned and that we should just go for it.

I have to know by early this afternoon.

Would you?

snoofle:

Would you?

 

Are you willing to stay late and do the cleanup too? If yes, then go for it :P

snoofle:

Would you?

 

No. But I would fill his car while he is inside work.

I'd go for something more subtle myself. Maybe fill his cabinets and drawers with the packing peanuts, along with his office supplies. If his chair has wheels, put them in there too. Then tape those up. Put some kind of "Welcome!" treat in one of the drawers - some sort of food that he'll enjoy, but will get very smelly very quickly if he ignores the drawers.  

snoofle:

I think I should fill up the new cubicle with peanuts, and hermetically seal it with clear plastic packing tape. My friends' new boss agrees, but isn't sure if it's a good idea.

 

I would put tape across the doorway of the cubicle, and a half-tube of paper behind it, and fill this semi-cylinder with peanuts. This way it looks like it's filled to the brim, but it's not a total pain in the ass for him to clean up.

Example: http://www.hacknmod.com/displayMOD.php?hack=1194

Just put clear tape across the cubical door, and cover the back of the tape with peanuts. If the walls are tall enough, it might look like it's full. :)

[edit] crap, beaten to the punch!

KNY:

I would put tape across the doorway of the cubicle, and a half-tube of paper behind it, and fill this semi-cylinder with peanuts. This way it looks like it's filled to the brim, but it's not a total pain in the ass for him to clean up.

I agree with this only if the prankee is short enough. If he's able to see over the walls of the cubicle then it won't work.

Go for it, snoofle, as long as you help clean it up afterward.

 Now if you could get your friends new boss to make him clean it up then go for it.

snoofle:

I just found out a prankster friend of mine was hired by my company...

A preemptive action such as the one you've proposed could lead to a prank war the likes of which your company has never seen.

 Choose carefuly.

MasterPlanSoftware:

No. But I would fill his car while he is inside work.

 
Dude Ethics 101: Do not mess with another man's car.  It's simply off-limits, like kicking him in the balls.   Expect severe escalation and quite possibly an end to the friendship if you do.

Cubicle's fine though - it's not even his personal property.  I probably would. 

You should make it interesting. Wait until he comes in to the office, and then knock him to the ground with a swift tackle. Force feed him the packing peanuts until he starts to choke, and then set fire to his hair while smearing his face with decomposed 'welcome' food. Once done, blame your mother and run around crying.

Aaron:

Do not mess with another man's car.  It's simply off-limits, like kicking him in the balls.  

 

I fail to see how filling a car with styrofoam peanuts is anything like kicking someone in the balls. Plus, messing with company property during work hours is even dumber.

Do it and just tell him it was a temp storage room for fragile equiptment...  Oh and don't forget to fuck him out of it for making a mess...

merreborn:

snoofle:

I just found out a prankster friend of mine was hired by my company...

A preemptive action such as the one you've proposed could lead to a prank war the likes of which your company has never seen.

 Choose carefuly.

Just what I was thinking. The prankster might not want to do pranks in work, but after a pre-emptive strike, everything's fair game.

To all of those who are about to be pranked, we salute you!!!!

Aaron:

MasterPlanSoftware:

No. But I would fill his car while he is inside work.

 
Dude Ethics 101: Do not mess with another man's car.  It's simply off-limits, like kicking him in the balls.   Expect severe escalation and quite possibly an end to the friendship if you do.

Cubicle's fine though - it's not even his personal property.  I probably would. 

So I guess the old CS(tear gas) powder in the A/C vents while the car is off trick that I was witness to in my Army days would be right out then?

Lexarius:

Put some kind of "Welcome!" treat in one of the drawers - some sort of food that he'll enjoy, but will get very smelly very quickly if he ignores the drawers.  

 

I'd recommend a sack of slyders... 

I agree about not messing with his car, but I know this guy for years, and we've worked together before. The prank wars were epic. I once swiped his desk calculator, so he had my desk, chair, and everything on and in it (except my calculator) shipped to another office. There is absolutely no doubt in my mind that he will strike first if I don't.

With that said, the space under the desk, behind the radiator, inside the desk drawers, and the entire cubicle is filled to the brim. Clear plastic tape has been taped across the front and over the top. When he finally digs out and goes to sign on, he will turn on his monitors (powered correctly), and start typing, but nothing will happen. He'll check the pc under the desk. The connections will be taught. The ethernet will be connected. The power will be plugged in and turned on. However, the entire PC case has been gutted and filled with peanuts. When he goes to call for help, the speaker and microphone portions of the handset have been reversed (he pulled that one on me 10 years ago).

Upon seeing what I was doing, and hearing tales of yesteryear, his future boss (a pretty regular guy) suggested that I stink it up a bit, so we put one tiny sardine, wrapped in plain copy paper, in the back of the bottom desk drawer (away from the heat).

Resistance is futile!

 

snoofle:

the speaker and microphone portions of the handset have been reversed

How do you accomplish this particular miracle?

Welbog:

snoofle:

the speaker and microphone portions of the handset have been reversed

How do you accomplish this particular miracle?

I rumaged through the phone closet on our telco floor, and found something similar to the original ATT black plastic beast. You unscrew the two ends, disconnect the speaker/mike unit, reverse the wires, reconnect, and reassemble - it takes all of 2 minutes.

It's not even possible with newer phones without major surgury, but if you're lucky enough to have a very old handset, you can really mess with someone, because they can still hear the other person, and the other person can still hear them; it just sounds like they're a million miles apart.

The other one that goes with this is if you put a single layer of tissue between the button-pad and the contacts beneath. If you press hard, it sort of works, but very intermittently (obviously, only on newer touch tone phones).

MasterPlanSoftware:

Plus, messing with company property during work hours is even dumber.

 

Not nearly as dumb as you MPS. 

Dude:

Not nearly as dumb as you MPS. 

 

Right.... If you are going to troll, please at least make it entertaining.

MasterPlanSoftware:

I fail to see how filling a car with styrofoam peanuts is anything like kicking someone in the balls. Plus, messing with company property during work hours is even dumber.

 
Don't try to play the "bad analogy" card, because it wasn't an analogy.  I said explicitly what they have in common: any action taken against a man's car or stones are both off-limits behaviour according to all current social norms and plain old common sense.

Messing with company property during work hours would be dumber if the boss wasn't already known to be in favour of the idea.  Knowing that he is, however, makes it pretty safe and not-dumb.

Aaron:

any action taken against a man's car

 

I am sorry, I guess I haven't read the newest issue of 'The metrosexual man's guide to pranks' yet.

 Dude Ethics 101: Do not mess with another man's car.

Ah, so that's why an annoyingly right-wing acquaintance of mine never spoke to me again after I covered his car in 'Vote Labour' stickers? I'll bear that in mind.

snoofle:

The prank wars were epic.

Does your boss know this, and which of you is going to have to work unpaid overtime ot make up for the tiame wasted by pranks?