I have a plethora of WTFs all surrounding working at blizzard entertainment in irvine, california. My friends and i have all finally vanquished the NDAs that they had to sign (i think i dodged that bullet).

For example, since GMs have to know intricate details of the game world, there is a very large internal database of every object in the game with all stats and information you could possibly want to know about it. The problem was, all the GM computers were networked together with 100bt connections to an extremely slow switching system. The servers run Oracle 9 RAC, and by some ingenious twist of luck, those servers hated talking to machines in the same building (but were fine talking to tens of thousands of users all around the US). Not only were the ticket queues in the "hours" range of delay, but pulling up even the simplest item in the game (linen cloth) would take 15 minutes... during lunch. So every GM that wanted to maintain >15 tickets per hour were forced to use a different system... thottbot. Thottbot is paid for (sponsored) by IGE. IGE is a company that pays chinese workers crap salaries to log in to World of Warcraft, run in circles killing the same 20 badguys all day for 12 hours, and then deposit their in game loot into a central "character bank". IGE then takes that in game currency, and sales it for real world currency. And we're not talking peanuts here, back when i was working for blizzard the going rate was 1 dollar for 5 gold in game, and any people who play wow will understand that's obnoxious. So back to the point, the GMs were forced to use a database that was paid for by a company that blizzard was trying to sue out of existence. All because the network infrastructure on site was slower than 2400 baud.

I do have to say, though, that both of my hiring managers were LA 10s on the hotness scale, something that i've never seen nor will probably ever see again. 

Another shorter more cohesive example involving me personally:

When i was hired on, there was a severe need for Game Masters, due to ticket times beginning to breach the 24 hour mark. As i was an avid online gaming enthusiast, i intended to really bring the hammer down on asshats in-game. I asserted myself as such during the interview process. They said that it would be a breath of fresh air to have someone who actually gave a crap about the people who enjoyed playing in "safe" environments.

So during my probationary period i was constantly conferring with my team lead (AKA assistant floor manager, there were 5 of them per shift or so) about naming violations, and various other policy violations. I spent a lot of time actually investigating violations in game (using the GM wow client); and as such, my ticket times were lower than average, but i was removing the sneakier players from the servers. One day, near closing time, unbeknownst to me, there was a department manager over my shoulder while i was in game with a user that was a real pain. His character name was "nizzle"; he was scamming players out of in game currency, etc. He was crying a river about how he didn't understand why he was getting banned, etc. I followed the company rules to the letter... except when i told him i was removing him from game, i said - in real life, quietly, mind you - "you just got pwnd", and i spammed the "User Account Ban - 72 hours" button a little too uproariously for that manager's tastes. I was served my walking papers a mere 15 minutes later.

For the record, i was the first GM ever fired from Blizzard Entertainment. :-D 

Make love, not warcraft.

GeneWitch:

both of my hiring managers were LA 10s on the hotness scale

So why exactly did they fire you - because you were too heavy-handed with the Ban button, or because of your "pwned" comment? Either way, that doesn't sound like a company I'd like to work at.

Also, the info about IGE and thottbot is lollerific.

what's the big deal. I see no firing situation. He'll be back in the game in 72 hours anyway.

This post is wrong on so many levels it's sickening.

 1) "Forced" to use thottbot. I'm assuming that you were at Blizzard some time ago, there is Allakhazam (before it was also bought to be under IGE's parent). If this is a new thing, then there's also WoWHead, which I'm pretty sure is *not* under that company, and of course the WoW Armory now, so yeah, no-one was "forcing" you to use thottbot. You obviously didn't really care.

2)  Complete lack of understanding of "customer service". We we'll give it that Blizzard in general sucks at Customer Service, but telling a guy he got "pwned" is BAD customer service in all senses of the term. You were a gamer on a power trip, and deserved to get fired.

pitchingchris:

what's the big deal. I see no firing situation.

pitchingchris:

He'll be back in the game in 72 hours anyway.

If I ever heard somebody try to say the word "pwned" out loud, I'd fire them too. 

JamesKilton:

but telling a guy he got "pwned" is BAD customer service in all senses of the term.

Did you actually read the post, or just vomit on the keyboard and see what came out?

OP:

except when i told him i was removing him from game, i said - in real life, quietly, mind you - "you just got pwnd"

Recursive PWND!

MasterPlanSoftware:

JamesKilton:

but telling a guy he got "pwned" is BAD customer service in all senses of the term.

 

Did you actually read the post, or just vomit on the keyboard and see what came out?

OP:

except when i told him i was removing him from game, i said - in real life, quietly, mind you - "you just got pwnd"

Good morning MasterAsshat!  Is this another one of your "useful" contributions unlike my contributions? lol

Aaron:

If I ever heard somebody try to say the word "pwned" out loud, I'd fire them too.

Agreed.  That ought to be a firable offense anywhere in the world.

bstorer:

Aaron:

If I ever heard somebody try to say the word "pwned" out loud, I'd fire them too.

 

Agreed.  That ought to be a firable offense anywhere in the world.

Blizz GMs are not asked to act like the corporate assholes.  They role play, the make jokes, they use gamer language.  It's part of the game. 

Lysis:

bstorer:

Aaron:

If I ever heard somebody try to say the word "pwned" out loud, I'd fire them too.

 

Agreed.  That ought to be a firable offense anywhere in the world.

 

Blizz GMs are not asked to act like the corporate assholes.  They role play, the make jokes, they use gamer language.  It's part of the game.

No, but anyone anywhere who says "pwned" OUT LOUD is a moron.

bstorer:

Lysis:

bstorer:

Aaron:

If I ever heard somebody try to say the word "pwned" out loud, I'd fire them too.

 

Agreed.  That ought to be a firable offense anywhere in the world.

 

Blizz GMs are not asked to act like the corporate assholes.  They role play, the make jokes, they use gamer language.  It's part of the game.

 

No, but anyone anywhere who says "pwned" OUT LOUD is a moron.

 haha How about someone who verbalizes "lolz"? 

http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1771556 

bstorer:

but anyone anywhere who says "pwned" OUT LOUD is a moron

How would one say it out loud?  the jury seems to be out.  If you watch the show on purepwnage.com, they say pwnage as if they were saying "ownage."  I, however, have always thought it would be like "ownage" but with a p on the beginning.

Discuss. 

I agree with whatever Quietust just posted above.

JamesKilton:

This post is wrong on so many levels it's sickening.

 1) "Forced" to use thottbot. I'm assuming that you were at Blizzard some time ago, there is Allakhazam (before it was also bought to be under IGE's parent). If this is a new thing, then there's also WoWHead, which I'm pretty sure is *not* under that company, and of course the WoW Armory now, so yeah, no-one was "forcing" you to use thottbot. You obviously didn't really care.

2)  Complete lack of understanding of "customer service". We we'll give it that Blizzard in general sucks at Customer Service, but telling a guy he got "pwned" is BAD customer service in all senses of the term. You were a gamer on a power trip, and deserved to get fired.

1) Are you sure you're not confusing IGE (the gold sellers) with IGN (the internet gaming news and community site network)?

2) Yes, but he DIDN'T tell that guy he "got pwned"...he said it under his breath whilst presumably offering a good, professional level of in-game customer service within the GM guidelines.

Nice rant though :) 

I would say owned, because it derives from this word...

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=pwned 

I must be the only one who reads it as "pawned".   (If you want to pronounce it liked "owned", then just say "owned" and be done with it.)  But then again I don't play any games where it's used, so WTF do I know.

Sorry, I misread the article about the "pwned".

 As for IGE vs IGN, no I am not mixing those up. Thottbot and Allakhazam are owned by the same company that also owns IGE, the gold selling company. IGN is not anywhere in this mix last I checked.

JamesKilton:

As for IGE vs IGN, no I am not mixing those up. Thottbot and Allakhazam are owned by the same company that also owns IGE, the gold selling company. IGN is not anywhere in this mix last I checked.

JamesKilton:

Sorry, I misread the article about the "pwned".

 As for IGE vs IGN, no I am not mixing those up. Thottbot and Allakhazam are owned by the same company that also owns IGE, the gold selling company. IGN is not anywhere in this mix last I checked.

Dear Mr. Ex-GM,

What happens when the stoppable force meets the unstoppable force?  And is it true that GM Island is just a place for GM pr0n? 

JamesKilton:

Sorry, I misread the article about the "pwned".

 As for IGE vs IGN, no I am not mixing those up. Thottbot and Allakhazam are owned by the same company that also owns IGE, the gold selling company. IGN is not anywhere in this mix last I checked.

Must apologise then, guess I must have that Acronym Dyslexia Syndrome (DAS) that I keep reading about!!

Aaron:

If I ever heard somebody try to say the word "pwned" out loud, I'd fire them too. 

Technically... Blizzard came up with it. In Warcraft 1!!!