aleph:

This is quite a gem - it's used to translate a laptop's un-numlocked keypad to the correct numbers when selecting a file from that list of 20 files (apparently Spectate doesn't grasp Fn+NumLock). Somehow I don't think laptop keyboards have standardized their numpad location, so I'm sure this breaks nicely on other hardware:

keypad_27500:           '19 December 2004
    xtemp = UCase(xtemp)
    If xtemp = "M" Then xtemp = "1"
    If xtemp = "," Then xtemp = "2"
    If xtemp = "." Then xtemp = "3"
    If xtemp = "J" Then xtemp = "4"
    If xtemp = "K" Then xtemp = "5"
    If xtemp = "L" Then xtemp = "6"
    If xtemp = "U" Then xtemp = "7"
    If xtemp = "I" Then xtemp = "8"
    If xtemp = "O" Then xtemp = "9"
    If xtemp = "M " Then xtemp = "10"
    If xtemp = "MM" Then xtemp = "11"
    If xtemp = "M," Then xtemp = "12"
    If xtemp = "M." Then xtemp = "13"
    If xtemp = "MJ" Then xtemp = "14"
    If xtemp = "MK" Then xtemp = "15"
    If xtemp = "ML" Then xtemp = "16"
    If xtemp = "MU" Then xtemp = "17"
    If xtemp = "MI" Then xtemp = "18"
    If xtemp = "MO" Then xtemp = "19"
    If xtemp = ", " Then xtemp = "20"

Apparently, he also doesn't grasp "the art of parsing 1 character at a time."  I would hate to see him try to add support, for say, thousands of files:

keypad_27500:           '19 December 2004
    xtemp = UCase(xtemp)
    If xtemp = "M" Then xtemp = "1"
    If xtemp = "," Then xtemp = "2"
    If xtemp = "." Then xtemp = "3"
    If xtemp = "J" Then xtemp = "4"
    If xtemp = "K" Then xtemp = "5"
    If xtemp = "L" Then xtemp = "6"
    If xtemp = "U" Then xtemp = "7"
    If xtemp = "I" Then xtemp = "8"
    If xtemp = "O" Then xtemp = "9"
    If xtemp = "M " Then xtemp = "10"
    If xtemp = "MM" Then xtemp = "11"

'...

    If xtemp = "OOO" Then xtemp = "999"

'...

    If xtemp = "OOOOO" Then xtemp = "99999"

'... 

    If xtemp = "OOOOOOO" Then xtemp = "9999999"

' Whew, That was a Lot of tyPing

aleph:

Somehow I don't think laptop keyboards have standardized their numpad location, so I'm sure this breaks nicely on other hardware

Duh, nothing to worry about: all other laptops are just figments of SpectateLaptop's imagination.

MasterPlanSoftware:

Yeah, I am not usually an advocate of spamming forums (quite the opposite really) but I don't feel bad about it on this forum, since it is very much relevant.

Also, when we get it further along, I won't feel bad about 'advertising' everywhere Spectate has already spammed. I figure those people will appreciate it. Like a support group.

I'd love the site to evolve into a 'one stop shop for all things Swamp'. Seriously, three or four times recently someone has posted a link to one of Spectate's posts/videos on an IRC channel I was on, without them knowing about this site or how truly insane the man really is.

A good summary will make it so much easier to convey the scope of the problem ;)

dabean:

I'd love the site to evolve into a 'one stop shop for all things Swamp'.

That's the intent. A collection of all the video links perferably with a blurb about why the retard posted it (from one of us, not him) will help all that.

MasterPlanSoftware:

Once the quoting is complete I plan on a random quoting module. But facts? Hmmm. Got some examples?

It should be simple to use some random-stuff generator to generate swampquotes and swampfacts. I'm thinking of some setup similar to my curse generator - or, heck, you could just use my curse generator data file on the site, since mr. Swamp refuses to do curses - just pick a better generator software that isn't as WTFy to install on your average web server as mine =) (Hint: installation involves SBCL and a few coredumps. =)

WWWWolf:

MasterPlanSoftware:

Once the quoting is complete I plan on a random quoting module. But facts? Hmmm. Got some examples?

It should be simple to use some random-stuff generator to generate swampquotes and swampfacts. I'm thinking of some setup similar to my curse generator - or, heck, you could just use my curse generator data file on the site, since mr. Swamp refuses to do curses - just pick a better generator software that isn't as WTFy to install on your average web server as mine =) (Hint: installation involves SBCL and a few coredumps. =)

I was more asking for examples of 'Swamp facts' but I will take a look.

WWWWolf:

It should be simple to use some random-stuff generator to generate swampquotes and swampfacts

No need to embellish or parody in this case I'd say, let the facts speak for themselves.

DrPhil:

I agree with an earlier post that we should have some type of open forum on the site that gives Spectate an opportunity to spew his swamp gas, and then allow us and our 2 million new viewers to 'comment' on his spew.  

It would be like having our own internet alien on view in our internet 'zoo' for the world to watch in awe as he goes about his daily life.  The rest of the site would be background leading up to the live swampie exhibit...

Thirded. This is a genius idea...

...although am I the only one who's noticed that Swampy has come to this forum, said a bunch of things that seem unbelievably stupid, and managed to convince a large group of technical experts to spread his teachings to the Masses free of charge? Is it... is it remotely possible that Mr Doug Pederson is actually an evil genius supervillain who has us all in his thrall?

Still doing a dance this summer. No vivid message or dream. That will happen. I just got back from visiting my Mask maker friend. The mask will be huge. It will need some wild hair attached. Pretty scary. Dances have to be scary I have always wanted a 6 foot stick so I can display the Head stone in a positive manner. Then hold it up 14 feet if I need to drop it on something? I just don't know what the curse is yet. Could be cancer. Maybe a step or two for the NetSquared organization. The stockmarket has been cursed with the lieingest. cheatingest group of smart guys grabbing everybody's money. It ain't us dumb guys that are the thieves --. Years back a curse was put on "Stein Valley". Logging companies were going to build a bridge across the Fraser River to get access to the timber. I have pictures from the gathering at the top of Stein Valley from the year before. I'll post some. 350 people hiked straight up into the mountain. To save the last major undisturbed valley in B.C. I had a pack that weighed 90 to 100 lbs. 1/3 was stone. I wasn't the last into camp but 2nd last. The loser was a blind fellow. I passed him in the final couple hundred yards. The stones didn't go to NY in 2000. So the most recent time I had the Stones in a big big dance, was the 1988 winter olympics. Need to dance them a couple more times before 2012. You now know 90%. The last part is the spooky stuff. BOO

P.S you Swampies have been working hard and forming quite a team. Good going.

There might be a t-shirt or 2 for any swampie in San Francisco during the mashup. Ask they why poor poor old swampie got the boot.

 Quick question:

In VB the single quote is the start of a comment line?

If yes, then by god has he heard of version control? This reminds me of how support used to check fixes in in my previous job:

1) no use of version control

2) each fix had a separate directory on a share drive which if not applied in propper order would override some file somewhere

3) sometimes fixes would overlap eachother

4) all fixes had the following in the comments to indicate what was fixed:

(pl/sql)

-- <name> fixed case number <salesforce case number> on <date>

<bunch of code>

5) Developers had no salesforce login

6) If they actually opened a bug in bugzilla, it was usually  "client x thinks something is wrong". And I don't mean that there would be more detail.

Sorry went off on a rant, but seeing the glory of SS's code immediately gave me a flashback.

dlikhten:

Sorry went off on a rant, but seeing the glory of SS's code immediately gave me a flashback.

It's okay.  Swampy goes on many flashbacks.  His are just fueled by LSD. 

SpectateSwamp:

...

I think he reads all our posts and actually sees exactly what he wants to see... Here is what this entire form looks like from his eyes:

---

MasterPlanSoftware

Hey SpectateSwamp, you are awsome! I love your Desktop Search, it changed my life.

--

bstorer

Hey SpectateSwamp, you are awsome! I love your Desktop Search, it changed my life.

---

MasterPlanSoftware

Hey SpectateSwamp, you are awsome! I love your Desktop Search, it changed my life.

--

bstorer

Hey SpectateSwamp, you are awsome! I love your Desktop Search, it changed my life.

etc...

dlikhten:

I think he reads all our posts and actually sees exactly what he wants to see...

This applies far beyond just this forum.  Try his entire life, for example. 

SpectateSwamp:

Could be cancer.

Ooh ooh ooh pick me! Pick me!

Was that supposed to scare us? Go ahead, curse me with cancer... really, I insist. Just get the damn thing on video.

bstorer:

This applies far beyond just this forum.  Try his entire life, for example. 

Not to beat a dead horse, but I think this is exactly why we cannot simply dismiss Swampy as "just another annoying Internet troll."  That is, unless you want subscribe to the theory that Spectate's entire life is simply one fiendishly clever practical joke, which would be a WTF in and of itself.

I can just imagine Spectate's "alien hunter" buddy delivering the eulogy at his funeral:

"'To many of us, [SpectateSwamp] appeared to be a man of many esoteric interests and hobbies, such as hunting aliens, collecting mystical stones, cursing his implacable foes and transforming the world into a utopian paradise through Desktop Search.

"I'm sure, at one point or another, we have all felt vast concern for [SpectateSwamp's] mental health.  At other times, we have simply been frustrated and annoyed by [SpectateSwamp's] refusal to see things from the point of view of others.  No doubt this made him a very difficult man to deal with.

"Well, today it is my regretful duty to inform you that: YOU GOT PUNKED!  That's right, it was ALL A JOKE.  The election campaign, the apparent mental illness, the aliens, the desktop search and the medicine stones.  ALL OF IT.  [SpectateSwamp] spend DECADES setting you chumps up for the punch line, and I'm here to deliver.  [Spectate] asked me to personally deliver his last message to all of you: 'HOW YOU LIKE ME NOW, BITCHES?'"

Seriously, no ordinary troll expends this much effort on a "practical joke" just to piss people off.  Spectate is either insanely trollish or trollishly insane - take your pick.

SpectateSwamp:

I just don't know what the curse is yet. Could be cancer.

If you really believe you can give somebody cancer, and you have no qualms about it, you are truly a monster.  It's stuff like this which allows me to diss you without feeling much guilt.

 That's my blue tent. In the center of the first picture and near the other where the guy is taking down theirs.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lm9N-EmRMfY

The last picture was at Lytton BC across the river at the mouth of the Stein the following year.

Can't seem to even upload temporary pics to archive.org. Somebody must have ratted me out. Damn no goods.

CodeSimian:

If you really believe you can give somebody cancer

CodeSimian:

Seriously, no ordinary troll expends this much effort on a "practical joke" just to piss people off.  Spectate is either insanely trollish or trollishly insane - take your pick.

It warms my heart to think of him as a troll of a level far beyond Andy Kaufman.  If I'm going to get burned by a troll, at least it's the greatest troll of all time.

Still, I know he's not a troll.  I honestly believe he had a psychotic break and no longer has a firm grasp on reality.

SpectateSwamp:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lm9N-EmRMfY

Why the fuck did you turn a couple pictures into a video?! 

elgate:

I get enough respect from other forums to keep me happy.

SpectateSwamp:

No no never. Curse cancer itself. Don't need to do a curse to give folks cancer. There is way too much of it around already 

Oh SpectateSwamp, you magnificent bastard!  I don't know whether to loathe or pity you. 

SpectateSwamp:

That's my blue tent. In the center of the first picture and near the other where the guy is taking down theirs.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lm9N-EmRMfY

bstorer:

Still, I know he's not a troll.  I honestly believe he had a psychotic break and no longer has a firm grasp on reality.

On the bright side, he's highly entertaining! 

spenk:

Why display the photos on your pc and then capture the entire desktop as a video? Couldn't you just uplo